Was Spike A Bad Boyfriend?
NO, He Wasn't!

It was Buffy who started the sex marathon with Spike, by first kissing him (twice, in different occasions) and then jumping on him as he were a maypole. According to her, she wanted to "feel", and sleeping with a "soulless evil thing" was the only way she managed it. 

Well, OK, you want to feel, you have sex with someone you don't care — but know that he/she is deeply in love with you — you hate yourself and takes it out on him/her, when he/she wants to change for better you tell him/her that this is something impossible, you beat him/her to a pulp, and then you dump him/her when it pleases you, because it was hurting... you. Buffy did all that, not Spike, and the bad boyfriend was supposed to be... him? Sorry, but I didn't buy it, folks.

A man who wants to talk about the relationship instead of "turning evil" after a night of wild sex, a man who wants much more than wild sex, a man who is there for you ALWAYS you need him, a man who risks his own (un)life for your annoying fake little sister, a man who takes care of said little sister even after your death, a man who continuously saves the lives of your stupid and ungrateful friends, a man who likes to stay home watching TV, a man who likes to cuddle... a man who wants to change for better, and DOES CHANGE, risking his own life and his mental health in the process, can be a bad boyfriend??? When? Where? How?

Oh, but this man was a killer. He used to lie, steal, manipulate... drink and smoke (nobody is perfect...). Well, he used to be an EVIL SOULLESS VAMPIRE, remember? And he was making an effort to stop doing all that. And never did he try to make Buffy do such things (oh, the sex in The Bronze balcony was eeevvilllll, I forgot, sorry). Spike wanted Buffy to "stop with the bloody hero trip for a sec" and be happy; he wanted to be with her in the light, wanted her friends to know about them — they might "understand and help, God forbid." Buffy was the one who insisted on pushing him into the darkness. It was really amazing that this soulless thing, without any support, ended up as a Champion, a Hero. He became a better man out of love for a woman, but the merits of it are just HIS. He faced the monster inside him and fought back — Buffy herself told him so. 


I have come to redefine the words pain and suffering since I fell in love with you. 
(Spike to Buffy in Never Leave Me)